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Exploring the Seasons of Life


Jul 14, 2020

Cindy MacMillan: (00:00)
This is Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast episode 17. I’m Cindy MacMillan and today’s guest is Lynn Principe Golden.

Welcome to Exploring the Seasons of Life, a podcast for women with a big heart on a spiritual journey. Each week, join Cindy MacMillan as she interviews coaches, spiritual explorers and celebrants from all walks of life about beginnings, endings and the messy bits in-between. Self-love, well-being, and mindset are at the heart of our conversations because once you change the inside, the outside will begin to change as well. 

Cindy MacMillan: (00:00)
Welcome back to Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast. Thank you for listening and get ready...it's time to hear some words of wisdom from today's guest.

Cindy MacMillan: (00:00)
Lynn Principe Golden is an End of Life Doula, Hospice volunteer and Life-Cycle Celebrant. She is the owner of Dearly Beloved Life LLC and is passionate about rites of passage, and believes that like birth, death should be held as a sacred event. She is certified through the Conscious Dying Institute where she is currently working towards being a Conscious Dying Educator. She lives in Dunedin, Florida with her 2 teenagers.

Lynn Principe Golden: (01:23)
Thank you so much, Cindy. I'm very excited to be here.

Cindy MacMillan: (01:27)
This is a really interesting subject to me, so yes, I'm excited to have you here, but I do want to start off with my signature question and that is what does exploring the seasons of life mean to you personally or in your business?

Lynn Principe Golden: (01:43)
That's a great question, where I stand now, I'm entering a new phase in my life and I'm nearing 50. I'm newly divorced, and I have children that are mostly grown. And what I realized is I'm becoming more clear about who I am and what matters most to me. And what I know is that I no longer have an end game. I don't have a place where I feel like, you know, when I think as young women, when we're in our twenties, we think, well, by 30, I want to be married or we have all of these to-do lists and I feel free because I no longer have those. So I'm in this space where I'm becoming more present and I'm living a life for myself rather than the one that I perceived was meant for me. So that's been very freeing. And as far as being an end of life doula exploring the seasons of life is really vital to our work.

Lynn Principe Golden: (02:31)
And I feel strongly that our dying is a rite of passage. Like you said, like birth, and it's a sacred event. It's a time to ask yourself different questions like what's given my life meaning or who do I need to forgive in order to feel more at peace? How do I want to be remembered? And these are conversations that are important to have simply because we're not guaranteed to live a long life into old age. So it's a great question. And believe me, I am a lot of fun to have at dinner parties because I love to get deep into these, these questions that you're asking.

Cindy MacMillan: (03:04)
That was a beautiful way of explaining the seasons. So thank you. And I really do want to hear about your journey of becoming an end of life doula. But first, can you just tell us what is an end of life doula?

Lynn Principe Golden: (03:18)
I would love to, it's not a simple answer because it does encompass a few things. So an end of life doula provides non-medical support and comfort to a dying person and their families; so much like a birth doula provides at the time leading up to birth and during the birth process. We advocate for the needs and wishes of our dying patients. An end of life doula provides education and guidance as well as spiritual, emotional and practical care from as early as initial terminal diagnosis through bereavement. So within the diagnosis through bereavement, there are many steps that we'll walk alongside you with. And the three main aspects of the doulas role are before death planning, bedside vigil and after death care. And the planning phase I'll work with my clients to identify their vision for what they want their last months, weeks, and days to be like we take into account their current reality.

Lynn Principe Golden: (04:15)
And then together we create action steps. So that practical, emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental directives are in place. So it's not just the advanced directives that we're used to, you know, going to the lawyer and who gets what; it goes a lot deeper than that. And the second aspect of my work, and to me, the most sacred part is sitting bedside during active and imminent death. This can be done alongside family members and friends, or to give them a rest. And these visits can include prayerful companionship, touch, the easing of breath, relaxation, forgiveness. And lastly, an end of life doula can help with after-death body care and rituals according to their care plan and their values, many wish to die at home. And all over the country, people are starting to change that conversation and become more interested in green burials, home funerals, and a lot of alternatives out there, and we can help provide information and support so that those things are possible.

Cindy MacMillan: (05:14)
Thank you, Lynn, when you were talking about talking with your clients about the last few months of their life, you're not necessarily talking about what their ideas for a funeral per se, but it's really about what those last few months are going to look like in terms of that holistic look. Right?

Lynn Principe Golden: (05:34)
Exactly. And that can include the funeral planning and that's something that I'm also a Life-Cycle Celebrant, so I can have those conversations, but that may, under the realm of the spiritual, that may be something that they want to make sure it's included. Maybe there are certain prayers or songs that are really meaningful to them. And those are the times we'd have those conversations. And that way the people that need to know the information we'll have that before the time comes.

Cindy MacMillan: (06:01)
Yeah, I was going to ask you a little bit later, but maybe right now is a good time. I had read, a survey, that said that 92% of Americans say it's important to discuss their wishes for end of life care. And only 32% have had that conversation. So how do you start that conversation? And I'm assuming you start that conversation, not necessarily with the client, but their family, or would it be with a client?

Lynn Principe Golden: (06:30)
Well that's actually a really hard question. I want to back up a little bit. I think that we live in a death-denying culture and I hear people say things like if I die one day, rather than when I die. and part of the issue is, Stephen Jenkinson wrote a book called Die Wise, which I love, he talks about death as being treated as a failure of medicine rather than of a sacred rite of passage. And so we've turned over, what's been innate in all of us and knowing how to care for our dying and respecting the cycle of life. We've turned it over to science. And so the medical model is greatly built to treat and save and cure, which is wonderful. And they do amazing things. But sometimes at the expense of providing curative treatments that can greatly decrease a patient's quality of life and the time that they have left.

Lynn Principe Golden: (07:19)
And so back to your question, it should be happening more often in the medical training that doctors and nurses receive. That's first of all, another piece of this is examining our language around illness. You know, often we refer to people who have a terminal illness and are being treated, especially with cancer patients, we use the words fighting. So these patients are fighting cancer as if only the brave and the best fighters can win. So we set them up to either succeed or fail. I mean, you know, that cancer does not fight fair. And so we put judgment on someone who's dying and expecting them to fight harder or not give up. When we set them up, we feel, they feel they've disappointed us somehow, if they lose the battle, quote, unquote, Stephen Jenkinson also talks about the idea that at the end of life, people are willing to do a lot of treatment that may be harmful because they want "More Time".

Lynn Principe Golden: (08:13)
And he uses the words that are "More Time is now". And I think about that a lot, you know, he asks the question, what are you going to do with your More Time? And so back to what you asked me, I think that those conversations can start really simply you can be asking, you know, where would you like to be buried? Or who do you want there at your bedside? Or where, where do you see yourself dying are simple questions that can start the conversation. And another thing that I think is really important, especially if we have elders that are still in our lives is to ask them a lot of questions, have them tell and retell their stories, ask them what do they regret? And what's given their life meaning so that we do have those deeper conversations and the doors opened. So they feel like the conversations are possible.

Cindy MacMillan: (09:02)
Thank you for going through that I really and truly feel those conversations are needed. Maybe even before we get to the end of our lives.

Lynn Principe Golden: (09:13)
I think we should talk about them with our children. Yes.

Cindy MacMillan: (09:18)
Can you share your story on how you became an end of life doula?

Lynn Principe Golden: (09:23)
I'd be glad to, it's a winding road, as most of our stories are. So I come from a large close-knit family and I grew up in the Maryland DC area. And to us family was everything. Our gatherings were large and multi-generational often including great aunts and uncles, cousins, all of our grandparents. So it wasn't until, so it wasn't unusual, I should say that when I moved to Florida 16 years ago, I had a great aunt and uncle that lived here. I moved here with my then-husband and my two young children. My Aunt Mary and Uncle Frank never had children so I started visiting with them. They lived in a condo in St. Pete; it was a tidy and perfectly preserved 1960s condo. Mary, she was a sweet Italian woman, she doted on my children, filled them with sweets.

Lynn Principe Golden: (10:16)
And then there was her husband, Uncle Frank, and he barely concealed his irritation with my rambunctious children. And they had been married for many years and I can say that Mary was truly a Saint. Mary's health began to fade she was admitted to a hospital, then rehab center. I started visiting more often with the purpose of reporting back to my family up North, about how she was doing. And we became really close in those last weeks. It was really the first time I'd been close to the dying process and she let me in and she let me accompany her on that path. She shared with me the mysteries that she was experiencing, the relief of never having to cook for Frank again, the pain that she was experiencing. And it was a really beautiful and profound experience to be there with her.

Lynn Principe Golden: (11:09)
I was inspired to become a hospice volunteer and a Reiki practitioner. And after Aunt Mary died, I inherited Uncle Frank. So, sharing all of the stories and challenges of being the caretaker to my Uncle Frank would be a whole nother podcast.

Cindy MacMillan: (11:24)
Okay. We'll have you back for that.

Lynn Principe Golden: (11:27)
Some good stories for sure. I will give you my short version. I cared for him for the next seven years until his death at the age of 94. And he was an intense and complicated man. He was sharp-minded, sharp-tongued, and he demanded that he make his own decisions. At one point, I had convinced him to move into assisted living because he had fallen a few times. He hated every minute of it and he said to me the words, I'll never forget, Lynn, I'm being treated like a potted plant.

Cindy MacMillan: (12:02)
Hmm.

Lynn Principe Golden: (12:04)
So caring for him, it asked a lot of me, but he taught me what dying with dignity meant. He loved me deeply, which I know then, and I know now, and I credit him for showing me what I'm capable of doing. That I'm capable of doing hard things. And he often said to me, Lynn, you've got grit kid. And ultimately this work found me. I believe I had the opportunity to plan a few funerals for family members and was deeply interested in the power of words and rituals. And a few years after Frank's death, I came across the work of Alua Arthur. She's an end of life doula. And I remember thinking, is this really a thing? It was like I made it up. It was so perfect. And I found the Conscious Dying Institute out of Boulder, Colorado. And I became a Certified End of Life Doula. I founded Dearly Beloved Life and became a Life-Cycle Celebrant.

Cindy MacMillan: (12:58)
Your words of what you said, he said to you I'm being treated like a potted plant. That's that went right to my, to my heart. Yeah.

Lynn Principe Golden: (13:08)
Yes. I mean, if you've ever been into nursing homes and assisted living facilities, you understand what I mean?

Cindy MacMillan: (13:15)
You mentioned being a hospice volunteer. What is the difference between an end of life doula and a hospice volunteer? And I know that you can really just speak to this from your experience, but could you talk about that?

Lynn Principe Golden: (13:27)
I love that. Yes, absolutely. So, I'm a hospice volunteer. I started about 13 years ago. I'm what you call a transitions volunteer and transitions are volunteers that come in at the very end of life as they're transitioning into, into the dying process. And sometimes they have only days or hours left to live and oftentimes they are alone or their family's not in town. So when I come into the space as a hospice volunteer, I don't know anything about them. I may know just their name, their diagnosis, and their age. I sit with them for two hours at a time. And I try to make those two hours as calming and meaningful as I can. I'll often read to them or play music. And again, I don't know anything about them. Sometimes I can get some clues as to what I see hanging in their rooms.

Lynn Principe Golden: (14:20)
Maybe if there's a crucifix, I'll pray or I'll play certain music that I think they may like. And I feel like we provide a very needed service as hospice volunteers. And I've learned so much during those visits, but what I feel like I can, what I can offer as an end of life doula, it goes a bit deeper. I want to give you an example of a doula patient I had recently, he was a 44-year-old man. He was dying of a brain tumor. His wife contacted me and she had never heard of what an end of life doula was but what she felt was missing from his hospice care was the emotional and spiritual support that they both needed during his dying process. So the first visit, when I went to see him, I talked to her for a long time about who he was and what mattered to him.

Lynn Principe Golden: (15:06)
We played music that he loved. I read to him his favorite stories. We saged the room. We lit candles. And I got to know who he was and what mattered to them. And then when I was there, when he passed his two young children were home, they were five and eight years old. And together we did some rituals that I think were very comforting and that's not even a good enough word, but I'll say comforting. We were able to anoint his body together with the children. They surrounded him with flowers and there was an ease that they had. They were able to come in and out of the room and love on him. And I became really close with the family. And in fact, I provided his funeral services the week later. And what I want to speak to about the difference to me, it's one word it's intimacy.

Lynn Principe Golden: (15:55)
I was able to connect on a deeper level in the way that his wife especially what she really needed and what she felt was missing. And I do want to say he got great care from hospice; they were there and they made sure he had everything he needed. But what he needed, what they all needed from me was something different. And that was the bridge that I feel like a doula can provide. And as of right now, at least here, hospices are not hiring end of life doulas. And I really hope that that will change. And I want to be a part of that change because I can see having doulas on every hospice team, how we can provide a bridge from the physical, to the spiritual and emotional and more of the comfort care that I feel like is missing.

Cindy MacMillan: (16:37)
Since you do both. I can see as you're talking and you're talking about that intimacy, how that would be a great addition to that hospice team. I read this quote and I want to read it to you. And it's from psychotherapist and author Francis Weller and he wrote; “Bringing grief and death out of the shadow is our spiritual responsibility, our sacred duty.” That almost sounds like what a doula does.

Lynn Principe Golden: (17:09)
Absolutely. I love his work, especially his work and his writings around grief. They're so inspiring to me and beautiful. And he talks about the different kinds of grief; we are grieving things that we, I don't think we ever named as grief, but he describes it perfectly and he is so profound.

Cindy MacMillan: (17:27)
Yeah, and I had not read any of his work. And when I was researching for this podcast episode, I found that quote and I felt like it was just perfect for me to read right now.

Lynn Principe Golden: (17:39)
Right. And what I tell people is that grief is a winding road and there's no one way that grief is supposed to look; it's different for all of us and some days are than others. I don't think that grief ends. I do think that we're forever changed by it because we do love deeply. And that's our birthright. If you love someone and care about them deeply, why would you want to forget them? So I think that it's just a matter of incorporating that into our lives and allowing the wisdom that that person had to continue to inform us even long after they're gone. And Francis Weller has some great talks and you can find him on YouTube. And he has one, I think it's called the Five Gates of Grief (2013). I don't know if I have that right, but it's definitely worth listening to.

Cindy MacMillan: (18:22)
I will go out and look for that and put it in the show notes. So what is the most rewarding part of your job other than everything?

Lynn Principe Golden: (18:30)
That's a great question because these are hard conversations to have. And like I said, you know, the dinner party people say, well, what do you do? And I think, hmm, like how much do I really want to say right now? Because you know, I get the blank stare. They, you know, the blinking eyes, but one of the things that most people say is, wow, that must be really depressing and that couldn't be further from the truth. I mean, there are moments of sadness, of course, and I do allow myself to feel those. To be selfish for a moment I feel that having death as my teacher has taught me so much about life. I've recently experienced my own heartbreak and a huge life change. And being with death reminds me of what really matters. It's given me so many gifts. I feel that I've witnessed so much magic being with those walking between the worlds I get to see through their eyes.

Lynn Principe Golden: (19:19)
And the first time was with Aunt Mary and when the last thing she said to me was Lynn everything's going to work out for you. And that was such a beautiful gift. And I laugh about it now, because I think I should have asked her to be more specific, but I've witnessed the healing of relationships and such deep love and forgiveness. And of course, there is suffering too, as I said, but that's taught me to be humble. And sometimes all I can offer is a hand to hold and a blessing on their journey. So those are the gifts that I receive from being a doula.

Cindy MacMillan: (19:53)
You talked about rituals a little earlier, and I just want to talk about that a little bit deeper. What is the role of rituals at the end of life? And can you give us an example maybe of one of your favorite rituals?

Lynn Principe Golden: (20:07)
I love to, I love to talk about this. My favorite ritual that I do and I do this one very often is the anointing ritual. The anointing ritual that I use was developed by my friend and mentor End of Life Doula, Trish Rux. I will do this anointing sometimes before death and sometimes after, depending, and depending on what the patient or the family wants. And I found that when I include the family members in the ritual, that it gives a sense of healing and calm to everyone that's present. I want to give a couple of examples; I had a doula patient last year who had two daughters by two different women and these women, they were grown, but they'd always lived their lives in competition with one another. And there was a lot of resentment and his dying wish was to have them both there by his side.

Lynn Principe Golden: (20:58)
And you can imagine that there was a lot of tension. And especially when the emotions are so high, the death of their father, who they both adored. When I did the anointing ritual, I gave them each a handful of essential oils and they stood on each side of his bed. And as I read through the ritual, they together anointed their father's body and the room was silent. And there was such a peaceful presence at that time. And when I left that day, after I said, my goodbyes, the two of the sisters were in the kitchen, sobbing in each other's arms. And I felt that the healing that was provided through that ritual was more than I could have ever expected. And I know that he felt that too. I've also used this ritual, as I mentioned with the gentleman who was 44, who died recently, his five and eight-year-old children anointed his body.

Lynn Principe Golden: (21:49)
And they loved being able to be part of that. It's a way of honoring the body and thanking it for carrying us through and sank goodbye. And if you don't mind, I would love to read you this ritual that my friend Trish wrote.

Cindy MacMillan: (22:02)
I would love that.

Lynn Principe Golden: (22:03)
Okay. Perfect. Is this a good time?

Cindy MacMillan: (22:05)
Yes.

Lynn Principe Golden: (22:06)
As your body is outwardly anointed with this oil. So may you be filled with love, may you be held in a state of grace, affirmed in all your goodness and may you have eternal peace of mind, body, and spirit. We start with the forehead: We anoint this body, that his journey through this life on earth. May you rest in peace. We anoint these eyes that have seen so much. May you rest in peace. We anoint this mouth that has spoken truth and love. May you rest in peace? We anoint these shoulders that have borne many burdens. May you rest in peace. We anoint this heart that has loved so well. May you rest in peace? We anoint these hands that have worked so hard. May you rest in peace? We anoint these feet that have travelled so far. May you rest in peace?

Cindy MacMillan: (22:53)
I can see where that would be so healing, just to have those words read with the family, there doing the anointing.

Lynn Principe Golden: (23:02)
Right, and I think that when we talk about the word healing; healing, doesn't always mean that the person is going to be cured and live. It's a different type of healing and it's available for all who are present at the time of death.

Cindy MacMillan: (23:14)
Thank you, for kind of clarifying that because yes, the healing and I almost want to use the word as you used earlier the intimacy of that ritual is, is more what I was talking about with that healing. Just feeling just a sense of peace. That was beautiful.

Lynn Principe Golden: (23:35)
It is profound.

Cindy MacMillan: (23:38)
End of life doulas can provide several services and you've really gone through a lot of those and Lynn the time has just absolutely flown by. Can you talk a little bit about your services and how people can follow you on your journey? And is there anything that I should have asked you that I didn't?

Lynn Principe Golden: (24:02)
No, I feel like you gave me the opportunity to talk about what really drives me and what I'm passionate about. And in terms of the services I provide, I talked a little bit about the planning, the bedside vigil and the after death care. I want to go into a little bit of detail if I can, about the planning phase and the services that I learned through Conscious Dying Institute. They were created by our founder, Tarron Estes; we call them the Best Three Months. It's a planning tool that she developed that goes way beyond advanced directives and includes the five domains of life that I mentioned, spiritual, practical, physical, emotional, and mental. And so with each domain, I'll ask questions that about what feels unfinished or not yet put in place or communicated. And together, we create a vision of what we could provide for them, how we could provide the best outcome and create action steps so that their vision becomes a reality.

Lynn Principe Golden: (24:57)
And a few quick examples: spiritually you could ask if they're interested in having a last confession or they want to go deeper into the study of a spiritual practice, that's always interested them? Practically ask, do they want to die at home? And what would you need to do in order to make that possible? Or perhaps you want your ashes to become part of a coral reef? Who do we need to talk to, to make that happen? In the mental domain asking what their legacy is and what projects feel incomplete? Physically, how much pain are you okay with tolerating in order to stay present with your loved ones? Are there alternative techniques that interest you? Emotionally - and this is a big one for most of us is what's been unsaid? And who do you need to ask forgiveness of? And who do you want to forgive?

Lynn Principe Golden: (25:46)
And who would you want by your bedside? And who do you want to say goodbye to? I offer the Best Three Months I can come together with groups or I'm offering a free online six week, Best Three Months course. And you don't have to be actively dying in order to create your vision of your Best Three Months. I've created my own and done so with some family members and it really is eye-opening, and it helps us understand what feels unfinished for us, what we can do to have those conversations so that our family knows exactly what our wishes are. And if anyone's interested in getting more information about practicing the Best Three Months with me, or have a group that they want me to address this with them, they can email me at lynngoldenlife@gmail.com or they can check out my website dearlybelovedlife.com for more information. And the most important part of this I want to say is after you make these decisions and really get clear about what your vision is, is share the information.

Lynn Principe Golden: (26:44)
Because it doesn't do any good if no one knows exactly what you want.

Cindy MacMillan: (26:47)
Absolutely. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation 60% report that their loved one has a document describing their wishes for medical care. But what surprised me out of that 60%, only 48% knew where it was. So that's kind of like a little bit what you're talking about. Thank you. Thank you, for being here and going over everything. It just is, sounds so rewarding to me and I really appreciate you being here. But the last question I have for you is if you could turn back time and talk to your 18-year-old self, what would you tell her about the season of life that you're in right now?

Lynn Principe Golden: (27:30)
That's a great question. And I'm not one that lives with alot of regret because I can see in hindsight when each the challenge has taught me, but I think that as an 18-year-old young woman, I would remind myself to not be afraid to use my voice.

Lynn Principe Golden: (27:48)
And I think that's a big one for me.

Cindy MacMillan: (27:50)
Perfect. That is a perfect place for us to end. Thank you so much for being here.

(27:55)
Thank you so much, Cindy. I had a blast.

Cindy MacMillan: (27:57)
Thank you for listening to this week’s episode of Exploring the Seasons of Life podcast. I really enjoyed talking to Lynn Principe Golden about her journey to becoming an end of life doula and I would love for you to share this episode with your friends and family. Visit our website, CynthiaMacMillan.com, and sign up for our weekly newsletter. Until next time, live inspired!